by Leaha 15 Jun 2014

My grief is deep my own father passed in 2000. I took a friend out for father's day this morning...because I knew his kids would not; I wished him happy father's day...because I knew his kids would not; I do not understand how some kids can do this unless they were not taught to love and respect and honor the man who sired them. I pray for all of those men today, I will honor, adopt, respect and send them love through the internet. I miss mine so terrible, I am in tears. Some day when it is too late...maybe these kids who did not will miss the treasure they had and chose to ignore.

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by pldc 17 Jun 2014

I am so sorry to learn of your loss Leaha, it doesn't matter to me that is was so many years ago it may still feel like it was yesterday & I am sorry. Loosing a parent must be devastating. Like others before me have said you did a very nice thing to remind another man that he was appreciated but like others have also said their past must be painful to ignore that day & only they can move towards healing & forgiveness all we can do is add them to our prayers. ~hugs Loralye~

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Leaha by Leaha 17 Jun 2014

Thanks, it does seem like yesterday. I had to be the strong one to hold everyone else together, a lot of the arrangements etc., fell on me. After taking care of him for 2 1/2 years...it ended and I never got to say goodbye. I get ambushed by these emotions sometimes and it's usually at the strangest times. Thanks for saying these sweet things, they mean a lot to me. hugs Leaha

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by marianb 17 Jun 2014

You are a very special person to adopt a Dad, I'm sure he appreciated your company... and your right his own will be sorry they missed this time with him at the end..

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Leaha by Leaha 17 Jun 2014

Thank you, it did help but wasn't the same...

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by twee 17 Jun 2014

You are an angel

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Leaha by Leaha 17 Jun 2014

Not so much, but thank you for thinking such sweet thoughts.

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by marjialexa Moderator 16 Jun 2014

I know how hard some days can be, my Dad left us in 1995, and yesterday was very hard for me as well. Some days are just like that, I know I wish with all my heart that I could still have Dad around, I certainly was "daddy's little girl", and felt like Basketkase when he died, I felt like an orphan, and I was in my late 40's for heaven's sake, not a child. I still feel like an orphan. Thanks so much for making a special day for someone else's father, I'm sure your own Dad was there enjoying it with you as well. Love never dies, it just changes when one we love passes to the other side. We can no longer hold their hand, but we will always be in each other's hearts, long after the end of time itself. Hugs to you, friend, Marji

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Leaha by Leaha 17 Jun 2014

Thank you for the comforting words; once a 'daddy's girl always a daddy's girl.' I really don't think age has anything to do with the horrible sense of loneliness and emptiness one feels. He is your first love and your hero...nothing more can be said. I never got to grieve for him I had to be the strong one...so every now and then I get ambushed by the emotions as I did on Fathers Day. Thank you again for the kind words and hugs right back to you, Leaha

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by basketkase 16 Jun 2014

Oh, Leaha, what a wonderful gift you gave the man....the opportunity to mean something to someone!! It is so hard to fathom anyone treating another family member this way, especially a parent....both mine are gone from their earthly bodies and I miss them every single minute....that said, we don't know what went on in the household years ago when kids are so impressionable.......I hope they will find it in their hearts to forgive whatever they feel he has or has not done and form a new relationship with their father........

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Leaha by Leaha 16 Jun 2014

Thanks, Ms Vicki, with both of mine gone also, being an orphan isn't always easy for me. I took care of both of them as best I could and am feeling rudderless, as well as having had another scare. I just need to back off for awhile and get some perspective.

basketkase by basketkase 16 Jun 2014

Sounds like you have a good plan to take care of yourself!!
I know exactly what you mean about feeling orphaned....I said to my hubby, "I feel like I don't belong to anyone anymore".......although, I know that is not true it is still a weird feeling........

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by babsie 16 Jun 2014

We never know the way God thinks and I am sure he used you to be kind to someone who would otherwise have missed out on a Fathers day treat. I also lost my father and husband but I do have a Father in Heaven who will always be there for me. A big hug for you all the way from South Africa.

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PatriciaVosloo by PatriciaVosloo 16 Jun 2014

..en 'n drukkie vir jou Babsie! Groete uit Pretoria, Patricia

Leaha by Leaha 16 Jun 2014

You are so very right, Our Father in Heaven is always there, sometimes he carries me all day long and yesterday was one of those days. Thank you.

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by lindalee757 16 Jun 2014

That was a very special and sweet thing for you to do for this man. I am sure you made him feel special and it probably helped you also,without your own dad around anymore. I for one, miss my dad everyday-he passed away in 1995-he never got see some of his grandchildren and none of his great grandkids, but we all try to keep his memory alive for the generations.
Not to downplay this man, or any other-there may be deeper reasons that you or anyone else knows why his own kids weren't there one way or the other for him-not all men or women-for the matter are cut out to be fathers(mothers) and are the reason for the kids distancing themselves from their parents. Could be some skeletons that are better left in the closet.
You never fully know what goes on behind closed doors.

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Leaha by Leaha 16 Jun 2014

Thank you, your very right in that I don't know all the circumstances and I was probably wrong to bring my pain and express it the way I did.

marjialexa by marjialexa 16 Jun 2014

Dear lady, we don't know everyone's past, but you were not wrong to express your pain here, and you did a very nice thing for that man who would not have had a Father's Day without you. I'm sure your own Dad was with you in spirit, enjoying what you did for that man's lonely soul, and your own. I'm glad you cared enough to take some action, not just sit and mope about it, I'm sure it helped both of you, and it was a sweet gesture. Hugs, Marji

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by dragonflyer 16 Jun 2014

...what a very kind gesture...so sorry for your loss...hoping your spirits are lifted by your kindness to another father...

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Leaha by Leaha 16 Jun 2014

Thank you for the kind words. I was having a bad day, sometimes that happens.

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by gdsteliga 16 Jun 2014

I understand your message all too well. Yesterday a wonderful father received a phone call from a stepdaughter, an email from his daughter, but not one word from his sons or stepsons. All of whom are fathers. I felt his pain. The only son who would have called from the other side of the country passed to heaven two years ago. I hope these boys receive better treatment from their children in the future.
God bless you for caring. I am sure you eased the pain of another father.

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Leaha by Leaha 16 Jun 2014

Thank you.

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by airyfairy 16 Jun 2014

Across the miles I feel your pain in every word you have written. I have two wonderful teenage grandsons. Their mother divorced when they were young. Their father is not a bad man but he just 'forgets' he has two most wonderful sons. The boys always remember his birthday and of course fathers day - as my daughter says "two wrongs do not make a right". It is their father's loss. I on the other hand never had a father as he left my mother when I was 6 months old. I met him for the first time when I was in my thirties. He died shortly afterwards. How I would have loved as my grandsons do to have had a caring father. Hugs Sarah

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Leaha by Leaha 16 Jun 2014

Thank you, bless your heart. Bless the wise daughter you have for raising her children to be intelligent and thoughtful.

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by noah 15 Jun 2014

Way to go*** God just used you:):)And for that i am thank-ful hugs Carolyn

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Leaha by Leaha 15 Jun 2014

Thanks Carolyn, I appreciate you words. I never thought of it that way. I was just grieving in my own selfishness and posted my thoughts.

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by bevintex 15 Jun 2014

sometimes there is another side to the story. No one knows unless you live it

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Leaha by Leaha 15 Jun 2014

Thanks, I know you are correct, I am just being selfish and over come with the loss of mine on this day.

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by cfidl 15 Jun 2014

I usually do not post on this or similar subjects. I lost both my parents before I turned 12. I have no clue, however I do understand where you are coming from in that I have seen situations where I think I would behave differently

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Leaha by Leaha 15 Jun 2014

I'm sorry, I was insensitive when posting this. Thank you for understanding. I wasn't passing judgement, I am just over come with the loss of mine.

cfidl by cfidl 17 Jun 2014

We all have to talk about it. I know you were not passing judgement, and I can empathize with being overwhelmed with loss. Right now I feel the loss of my embroidery machine! Lol! yesterday I cried for a bird who may never fly.

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by graceandham edited 15 Jun 2014

This was very thoughtful of you and I'm sure your friend appreciated the kindness. Not every father acts in a way to be respected by his children and when those children miss him later, it is with mixed emotions and mixed regrets for what might have been on his part! For myself, I had a wonderful father and I try to honor him with my life and actions daily. I treasure memories of him especially on Father's Day, Memorial Day, his birthday, Veteran's Day, and Thanksgiving.

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Leaha by Leaha 15 Jun 2014

I realize this is true, I am just missing mine terrible. Thank you.

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by sewilso 15 Jun 2014

How sweet for you to do that. Family can certainly be odd sometimes, hope they come around and be respectful. I lost my dad in 2001.
You are so right they won't be there forever, we just never know.

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Leaha by Leaha 15 Jun 2014

Yes, this is true. I wasn't trying to condemn or judge anyone. Just since he is a family friend and have seen family time with them, it just doesn't compute.

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by jrob Moderator 15 Jun 2014

What a beautiful way to honor your own father, through honoring someone else's. I just know your Dad is so proud today.....

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Leaha by Leaha 15 Jun 2014

Thank you, I hope so.

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by pennifold 15 Jun 2014

I am so sorry that you are grieving so much Leah. I can empathise with you - my Dad died on Father's Day here in Australia (we celebrate in September) 4 years ago. God bless you for taking out this gentleman and making him feel so special. That's what love is all about and by your actions you are spreading the Gospel. Love and blessings Chris

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Leaha by Leaha 15 Jun 2014

I extend my sympathy to you also Ms Chris. How terrible for you. Thank you for understanding.

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by 02kar Moderator 15 Jun 2014

I understand your grief. My dad passed away several decades ago when I was in my 20s. How I missed him on my wedding day. But I know he would be proud of the woman I have become.

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Leaha by Leaha 15 Jun 2014

Thank you for understanding, I think I just needed a good cry. The even number of years are the hardest on me; I think I went through the 1st yr in utter shock.

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by anssmile 15 Jun 2014

Mine passed away in 1995, and I still feel like you. But he is in Heaven waiting for you... What a good friend you are, I am very sure your friend appreciated what you have done today. I hope you feel better soon...

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Leaha by Leaha 15 Jun 2014

Thank you.

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