by simplyrosie 18 Jul 2009

But it looks like I have more "issues" going on inside. All of my tests came back really bad.... the doctor emphasized "really" when she called me Thursday evening. I hate the "C" word, and refuse to use this... but oh have I just been so angry since hearing this news. I guess it's "normal" to have a range of emotion, but darn it, I'm too young for this!!!!


In the mean time, I'm up at my Mom's house and trying to spend as much time with my GM as possible. She had no clue who I was yesterday, so I just smiled and told her I loved her... She got this childish grin on her face and told me she loved me too. lol... I'm thinking to myself, I have 2 choices Teri... from my mind, she probably says that to everyone, but from my heart, deep down inside I KNOW she loves me... so I chose to believe the second.

She really is aging quickly and I don't know that I'll have her much longer, but one thing I'm really seeing through my trials is that life is but a temporary thing. Whether we are sick or healthy, do any of us know how much time we have? No.

After reading this my friends, PLEASE hug someone or something close to you... maybe it's your husband, a sibling, your children, a parent or a furry baby (like my Rosie). Tell them how much they mean to you and remember - life is about the here and now... not what we did in the past or a future that may or may not guarantee us a place here on planet earth. LIVE today my friends! LIVE!

I'll post some pics when I can. :-
xoxo
teri

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by sherylac 05 Aug 2009

My thoughts are with you Teri and your family. Life certainly throws some hurdles at us, thats for sure. Take each day as it comes enjoy it as much as you can as you said you never know what tomorrow may bring. Your GM knows that you are there for her. ****4u

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by jacquipaul 05 Aug 2009

Thanks for sharing this with us. I will keep you and your family in my prayers. You're a wonderful friend to so many.
*4u!
Jacqueline

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by lbrow 28 Jul 2009

My dearest Teri. If I could only reach out & hold u as I have done my loved ones so many, many times. Know this I learned to love u months & months ago. We do not understand God's reasoning but we do know he is there & has a reason for everything that happens.Do read 2nd Corinthians 12:7-10. Personally when I am laid low the only comfort I seem to find is in God's word & I usually go to the Psalms.

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by camylow 28 Jul 2009

My Sweet friend...I have just came to personal section and finally have had time to visit here....What a wonderful thing to know we have friends all around the world to stand up with us and provide support in OUR EVERY NEED...I am sending you a message filled with love and encouragement...many prayers will be with you as you walk this life...If ever you need someone, We shall always be here to lend a shoulder, an ear and a helping hand....But the most important thing to remember is our HEAVENLY FATHER has his arms around you and will carry you through anything if you just ask....You have just been given the biggest hug. I hope you feel everyones warmth being sent your way....deanna

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by nini 24 Jul 2009

Keep smiling! When we hear our heart he allways speaks the truth.

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by grandmamek 24 Jul 2009

Teri. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. Hugs for you. Mary

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by katydid 23 Jul 2009

I just saw this. I am always late and a dollar short. Teri, I will pray for you. please stay positive and I pray you have the the wisdom and understanding to accept one day at a time and tomorrow is always a new day. Love you. Kay

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by blhamblen 23 Jul 2009

Teri...I just saw this today and I'm sorry that I can't be with you to give you a BIG HUG and tell you EVERYTHING is going to be OK...LIVE for Today!! I've done so much looking behind and regretting what WE didn't do when we were together! My mom is going for a stress test today because she hasn't been feeling well...I dread the results...I just don't think I could take another death in my life right now. Love for your GM will always be in your heart.:)

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by asterixsew Moderator 23 Jul 2009

Thinking positive thoughts for you

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by meganne 22 Jul 2009

Hi Teri, I'm so sorry I haven't been here, especially to give you my support, but I have been so distressed by your health problem (putting it mildly) that I just couldn't find the words I needed to give you the love and comfort I am feeling for you. You have been constantly in my thoughts and prayers, but saying that doesn't even come close to my feelings for you. If I had the money I swear I would be on the next plane to come over and look after you and be there to help you through this.

Please dearest friend, just please, stay angry and fight this, but don't let the anger cloud your judgement and prevent you from making the decisions you will need to make to LIVE. They won't come easy, does anything? But you must stay positive and don't give in to the "WHY ME". Find other things to occupy your mind, but make your decisions yourself.

Doctors WON'T tell you WHAT to do, (they're too afraid of being sued if they give the wrong advice).

Find out all you can, read all you can, ask questions and push your doctors to tell you what THEY would do, what course of action THEY (if female) would take or (if male) would want their wife/mother/sister to take. You may have to really push for answers and really listen to what they say (or don't say between the lines).

And please don't hesitate to write to me if you want to vent or talk or whatever, it really does help to talk to others, survivors. There are far many more of us survivors than you hear about!.

And don't listen to, or read anything negative.... too often people want to tell you the bad stories, tell them you don't WANT or NEED to hear them and walk away or if it's written down, close the page!!!!

Be assured my prayers are with you constantly and if my virtual hugs were any stronger or more heartfelt you would collapse from lack of air.

Please keep us all apprised of your situation as we all love you so much we will worry ourselves sick until we know how you are going.

Sending my special Angel to watch over you...

Love, love and more love, Meganne

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pennifold by pennifold 23 Jul 2009

You my dear are an ANGEL yourself!

Love Chris

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by nonmusicmom 22 Jul 2009

Be strong and make special memorys with your GM while you still can. Hugs

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by stitchship 22 Jul 2009

You know, back in May we had an emergency with one of my children, and the doctors mentioned the C word, but by the Grace of God it was not that. You stay positive and remember that the Bible says that He is the High Priest of our profession (confession). Stay positive. Don't loose faith. Believe, only believe in His healing power.

He's a miracle working God. Remember you and your family are in my prayers.

Hugs *

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by newipswich 21 Jul 2009

Hi Teri, I'm praying that all will go well with your surgery & that you will again enjoy a "cleansed" - disease-free body.
May I share one of my favorite portions of scripture: Lamentations 3:21-23(KJV) This I recall to my mind, therefore have I hope. It is of the Lord's mercies that we are not consumed, because his compassions fail not. They are new every morning: great is thy faithfulness.

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katydid by katydid 23 Jul 2009

You are right. Every day is a new day!!!

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by simplyrosie 21 Jul 2009

Thank you my friends! I'm finally back at home and had such a nice time with my GM. Oh how I miss her so... she is truly a good woman and quite the pickle at times. lol.

I will be going in on the 20th of next month to have them remove the "bad" parts inside... I don't want a hyst. and will avoid having this done until I have no other choices. I'll know more I guess next month.

You all have been so wonderful.... I truly appreciate your words of encouragement and love! xoxo

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by jrob Moderator 21 Jul 2009

Teri, I have not had internet access for over 2 days and am just catching up since it was restored yesterday, and I am so sorry to hear this, BUT do not give a name or voice to anything until it is confirmed. The medical community is so far advanced today...there are miracles happening all around us every minute. I know 4 year old twins who were born weighing less than 1.2 lbs and they are vibrant and uneffected. You can come out of this on the good side, so please don't get bogged down in the unknown. God just adores you and wants you to be happy and well.
Your darling Esther knows somewhere deep in her heart that beautiful face and that smile that lights up her world. Isn't she lucky to have that peace and to feel so loved at the end of her journey? I know you will miss her, but don't miss her yet. Our time on earth is but a blink, but our time in heaven is for Eternity. You will get to spend eternity with her.;)

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jrob by jrob 21 Jul 2009

I read this AFTER I read Maria's post and I didn't mean to be flippant, I was just trying to be cheerful and I hope you don't take it the wrong way.

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by jasanne 21 Jul 2009

Hi Teri, I'm praying for you. As your 'issues' are similar to mine at the moment, here's praying both of us have a good outcome. Cyberhugs..

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asterixsew by asterixsew 23 Jul 2009

Thinking of you too

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by castelyn 20 Jul 2009

Teri, I also don't know what to say,
But you and your family are in my thoughts and prayers.
Thought I would send you some special flowers, to brighten your day - Hugs Yvonne

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by quiltgrama 19 Jul 2009

Big hugs for you....

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by crafter2243 Moderator 19 Jul 2009

I wish I would have words that would make everything alright or make you feel better. I don't. So I am sending you hugs and will keep you in my prayers. Angie

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by ksgram1 19 Jul 2009

Teri, I chose to hug you. You ARE someone very special. Please be assured that you will continue to be in my thoughts and prayers. Remember, "with God all things are possible." ****

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by sqdancer 19 Jul 2009

You and yours are in my thoughts and prayers Teri...one day at a time, that is all we can handle, he doesn't ask more from us than that...love and hugs Glenda x0x0x0x

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by memasanders 19 Jul 2009

My sweetheart you are in my prayers and know you are in my thoughts daily. God Bless

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by toet 19 Jul 2009

I am sending you a big hug.**********************************************************************

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by denice 19 Jul 2009

Terri, it is natural to be angry at these things and you have a right to be so, do not feel guilty about that emotion. Serious illness in ourselves and the ones we love do get in the way of our to-do list we have planned of our lives. The reality is most of life is beyond our control, we just have to work with what we get. The challenge is to not let the anger cripple us but to help us be stronger. It is a mind set and it looks like you are already on that path. Yes your Grandmother does truly love you and so does God and your family and friends. (Your Rosie is both for you). Every time you need to talk there are people here and many of us have experienced what your are going through and can talk very specifically about things if it helps you to do so. We can just chit chat about fun things as well. Thinking and praying for you. Denice

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by marjialexa Moderator 19 Jul 2009

Teri, your beautiful GM knows, deep in her soul, that you love her, and in that place she still loves you. The Alzheimers is a curtain between you, preventing communication as it was. But behind that curtain is your loving Grandmother, as she always was and always will be, living in the light of God. Alzheimers is cruel to those of us on this side of that curtain, because we remember, and miss our loved ones even thought they are physically right here with us. But for them, the world is actually peaceful, because they don't remember that they've forgotten, they live in the now, and forget to worry, forget regrets and 'should haves'. Hug her and love her as always, those moments will be important for as long as they last. Have the courage to love, even though you are not remembered, perhaps not appreciated as you would like to be, even though you don't feel the love returned. It is there, truly, just hidden from your sight. Love anyway. And love yourself. Do not feed the nameless horror with more fear. Do not allow whatever's "eating you" one more iota of nourishment. Look into books by Louise Hay. I will pray and pray for you, all the while I'm hugging my cats & dog. We are never assured of the next minute, let alone the next day. Live this minute, this day, and may the love of GOD fill your heart with peace and healing. I love you, Teri. Your sister from one of the lost tribes, Marji

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pennifold by pennifold 23 Jul 2009

That is beautiful - love chris

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by manami 19 Jul 2009

Teri, I'm with Chris, she wrote it so well. What a beautiful message you leave for us, even though you are having such a challenge in your life now. You are in my thoughts and prayers. Love, Yoriko

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by mops Moderator 19 Jul 2009

Oh Teri, what can I say. Lots of hugs and ongoing prayers, Martine.

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by shirlener88 19 Jul 2009

Teri, I have just found this and I am so conserned for you - I am grateful that you had your trip to visit with your mom and Esther - so sorry that her progression is going on at this time - when you surely could use the GM that has always loved you - but as Chris said - you know her and she really does know you - she has loved you for as long as you have been - the hardest part of Alzheimer's is this part - when they haven't been around someone and they don't recognize them - but deep down she knows you - and if you were there longer and had the time - just to be with her and she felt your love - she would be the same as you have had with her in the past - my eyes are filled with tears for you, dear one and I wished that I could take this from you - do it for you - but for whatever reason - this is for you to go through - God doesn't do this to us - but he helps us through it and I know you know exactly what you need to do and how to do it. I have heard your faith and your believe - you have a very strong will and you can handle about anything that it thrown at you - so be strong and stand up - against this and fight - fight for you - you are worth it - love each and ever person that you have in your life - allow them to love you. I will be praying for you, Teri with all my heart and soul. *4u

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by pennifold 19 Jul 2009

Dear Teri,

I believe all our lives are a trial, unfortunately some of us have to bear more than others, it isn't fair. Cancer isn't fair, Alzheimer's isn't fair, Parkinson's isn't fair, any illness isn't fair etc. etc. etc. - I am praying for your and your family and will keep you in my prayers along with my best friend who is going through a similar situation.

I am so glad you are with your family though- that is what counts most in our lives. Although your Nanna doesn't recognise you, you know her and what she was like before this disease.

I was only talking to Mum about Dad today and what we should do once he gets to that stage. My sister asked him on Tuesday what he wanted to do and you know what he said to her - "I want to stay here as long as possible". I am just so grateful that they are now living up here in Newcastle and are so close by (only a 4 minute car drive).

You are right about our time here on earth, none of us know how long we have. I agree wholeheartedly with you about giving hugs and telling your family and friends that you love them - wouldn't the world be a wonderful place?

1 Corinthians:
"Love is patient, love is kind.

It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.

It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.
Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.

It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

Love never fails.

But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away.

For we know in part and we prophesy in part,
but when perfection comes, the imperfect disappears.

When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put childish ways behind me.

Now we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.

And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love."

God bless you Teri and keep living life to the full. Love and blessings Chris

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memasanders by memasanders 19 Jul 2009

God I love you!

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by momabear 18 Jul 2009

a big hug for you

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by read180 18 Jul 2009

I am sending you the biggest hug I can with a tight squeeze. I shall keep you in my prayers. Remember we are never alone God is always by our side.
HUGS, HUGS, Cindy *4U

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