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by pldc ( edited 03 Feb 2016 ) 03 Feb 2016

I have come from the Dr.'s hoping to have good news. They told me you see that my incision would take 3-5 years to heal & I have just 6 months before I reach the 5 year mark. I expressed my concerns over the pain I have been having recently ( quite a bit more then usual) & his response was..........3-5 years is quite accurate for the "normal" surgery of this type. I caught the word "normal" & asked what that meant? He said the average or "normal" was upto & including 15 sutures. He then asked me to remind him of how many I had & through tears I replied 47............he said the good news is I am a third of the way there. I left in tears & did not stop crying until we got home again...........

Seeing the light @ the end of the tunnel gave me so much encouragement but to have that said I feel like he turned the light right off.................

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by gerryb 07 Feb 2016

Hang in, dear one. You'll make it! Praying.

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by sebsews 07 Feb 2016

Dear Lorayle, you have come so far. You will be able to see that light again. I pray the pain goes away and your health continues to get better. Myself and Cuties are so very proud of you! Big hugs, Suzanna

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by ansienaude 07 Feb 2016

dont lose sight but think of all the things you have achieve since the beginning of your recovery and with the help of the Lord your loving family and friends you will get the strengh to cope and take it one day at a time i will pray that the pain gets better hugs

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by zoefzoef 07 Feb 2016

Loralye, I'm not a doctor, so I can't really says how long it takes to heal. All people are different, all sugeries are different, and all people heal different. That 's what I have learned last few years with my husband. You have good and bad days. Stick to the good days, see how far you are already now, look at you friends ; we are always there for you. Talk to us, chat with us, write to us. We are a part of your family. You cn count on us. Big hugg sent XXXX

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by juanitadenney 06 Feb 2016

After reading your post I thought well... I have 7 months before I reach the 5 year mark for my brain surgery so we had ours just a month apart. I am sure yours was more involved than mine was but I have also had more pain in my head this past few months. My biggest problem since having this done in August of 2011 is the constant itching on the left side of my head where the surgery was done. Hope we both have bright futures ahead of us and LESS pain and itching. Juanita from USA

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juanitadenney by juanitadenney 06 Feb 2016

Just wanted to add I had either 23 or 25 sutures (don't remember) and also 4 screws to hold the scalp piece in (that was removed and then replaced) since they can't stitch or suture bone. Sorry this is gross isn't it?

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by momac 05 Feb 2016

Keep your chin up Loralye, some Doctors have no feelings. You have all of us on thee Cutie Site thinking of you. Hugs from Maureen

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pldc by pldc 05 Feb 2016

Maureen you are so kind thank you ~hugs~

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by airyfairy 04 Feb 2016

Please Loralye do not be despondent. You have come such a long way. You have been so brave. You are an inspiration to us all. Love and hugs Sarah

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pldc by pldc 04 Feb 2016

Ah thank you so very much Sarah, cuties are part of my light every day! thanks for shining & sharing yours. ~hugs~

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by lbrow 04 Feb 2016

Just took a moment to come on the scene and try and catch up a bit and this is the first thing I see. Could only shed tears as I've read the love and encouragement poured out to you my dear.. Life doesn't always hand us the bed of roses we desire sometimes we get more than that from the ones we love.. You are much loved! Never forget that! I know God never promised us a rose garden but he did promise he would walk through the thorns with us and He does that through our friends whom we may never see face to face and our families be they blood kin or not.. There will be better days as well as disappointing ones but we will come through with smiles as well as tears. God Bless and know I am also one of the ones who cares about you/ Much love/Lillian

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pennifold by pennifold 04 Feb 2016

How beautiful Miss Lillian, I'm continuing also to keep all of these lovely women on here in my prayers. I do hope that Ron is doing o.k. and you also! God bless you, love Chris

pldc by pldc 04 Feb 2016

Lillian thank you so very much, you & so many cuties are such a big part of my extended family. I am grateful for this every day! You are all also in my daily prayers that life may be easier to handle for us all & It is lovely to know that we are not alone...........~hugs~

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by basketkase 04 Feb 2016

Loralye, Pam has written such a beautiful and truthful comment below... Whenever you feel down, read her post, it should lift you right up, also keep doing what you have already been doing and that is keeping your mind and hands busy........Bless you...

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pldc by pldc 04 Feb 2016

Vicki thank you for your kind words, ~hugs~

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by justsew 04 Feb 2016

Lorale, YOU ARE A MIRACLE,, do not underestimate that. You do miracles every day by what you achieve after what you have been through.You have Love and friendship overflowing from every direction.
Feel it, Breath it,take in the strength and let it help you through.
Love and Hugs Pam

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pldc by pldc 04 Feb 2016

Pam your words are a comfort to me & a reminder. Time to look ahead & get off the pity pot. A project is exactly what I need something to put my attention on & move forward. Sometimes I know this but it is important to "hear" it from another person. Thank you my friend ~hugs~

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by haleymax 03 Feb 2016

May I add that you have so much going for you right now and this is just one tiny part. Yes, it looms like a mountain when the pain is bad. Be thankful (as much as possible) that you can feel that pain, that you are able to move. Not running yet, but walking. Try to find the positive even if it is a bad odor that you can smell(LOL). You WILL get there. Hugs and prayers.

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pldc by pldc 04 Feb 2016

thank you for your thoughtfulness Haley, ~hugs~

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by gramsbear 03 Feb 2016

Loralye, God is bigger than any Dr, so we will be Praying for a Miracle, cause they still happen, because God still cares for us. I am Praying for less pain and more healing, Hugs & Prayers, Judy...

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pldc by pldc 04 Feb 2016

Aw Judy your are so thoughtful..........I thank you

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by noah 03 Feb 2016

Oh Lor. that's not good news for you but,the real news is .
#1 your Well
#2 Losing the pounds
#3 You are loved
#4 Your family cares
#5 Your cute family loves you!!!Need i go on .There is lots to be thankful for***Right??Hugs Carolyn xx0

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pldc by pldc 03 Feb 2016

ah my dear sweet friend you have a lovely way of putting things into proper perspective. Thank you!~HUGS~

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by dragonflyer 03 Feb 2016

Sorry you did not get the news you were expecting...but we all heal in our own time....and you are making such good strides...I hope your pain subsides each day and you feel stronger and stronger...focus on the wonderful things in your life and be glad you have so much to be grateful for...stay strong, stay happy, and keep up the good work on your recovery.

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rescuer by rescuer 03 Feb 2016

hear hear

jrob by jrob 03 Feb 2016

I'll third that.

pldc by pldc 03 Feb 2016

many thanks Kim & you such a lovely patient friend. thank you ~hugs~

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by shirley124 03 Feb 2016

Dear Loralye, I am sorry you are in pain and did not get the good news you were hoping for. Like Bevintex says "One day at a time" That is the way I look at life also. I like Chris's verse from Isaiah 41:10 Keep this in mind as you take one day at a time. We are all praying for you, so just keep your chin up. Love and Hugs Shirley

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pldc by pldc 03 Feb 2016

thanks so very much Shirley, ~hugs~

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by crafter2243 Moderator 03 Feb 2016

I believe you will surprise the doctors and heal faster then you think. Please do not feel despair. You have come a long way and you will continue getting better every day.

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pldc by pldc 03 Feb 2016

Angie this is hopeful, thank you for saying this. ~hugs~

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by pennifold edited 03 Feb 2016

Oh! dear Loralye, I feel for you so much. You are an inspiration to me and I'm sure many others on here. You have been so brave and have endured so much. I like Bev's advice of taking one day at a time. I also hold onto the verse from Isaiah 41:10 - I'll add a piccie of one of the images at the end of this post. I know you were wanting a different answer, but just think of it as walking along a country lane enjoying all the beautiful wildflowers and you come to a new area and you take another path. Keep the end in sight, but don't worry about obstacles in the way - enjoy them. All my love Chris

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pldc by pldc 03 Feb 2016

your absolutely right Chris, he is with me every step of this journey & it is only because of this that I have come this far. I guess I needed the reminder. Thanks ~hugs~

zoefzoef by zoefzoef 07 Feb 2016

Lovely text.
Just wondering,.. Is there somewhere an explanation why it is the " right hand" ? Or is it literal speaking " the good hand" and not meant the opposite of left ?

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by pacmp 03 Feb 2016

He said in "Normal situations". My question would be, is your surgeon the best you can go to for the "not normal" procedures? If he is the best, then continue to trust that you must learn to continue to fight and continue to adapt the best you are able to. Now if he is not the best, for the rare conditions, then it is time to do more research to find just who is the best, and get evaluated by them. Sometimes there are online support groups and people will share what they have been told by their specialists, which could help you to know for sure, that what you are experiencing is normal healing, for your body, and not a new problem. If there is increased pain, this is also a sign that the nerves are regenerating, which can be a painful experience but it is also, good that they are regenerating. I too was in the 50 range of sutures or staples but have now had the surgeries 4 times, I am now almost 6 years since my last surgery and the last year have been having new pains that I believe is from the nerves. Especially happening in the base of the skull at the junction of the neck keeps almost feeling like one of the bolts into the discs may be coming out- remember I have 2 bars that screw into the skull, then the c2, c3 and c4, for each bar, the bars are about 3 inches apart and running down the back of my head and down the neck, so have at least 10 of these bolt ports which likely means that each of the other ports will also go through these pains, I have been having. I also would not take what he said as you have only been through a third of what you have already gone through. For me the healing goes in cycles, so I may feel this kind of pain, at each of the other ports or parts of the bar. but also since I have problems with instability of the cervical spine I have also learned how to traction my neck to see if I can restore the spinal fluid flow and I have been able to do it, though it also does not hold, so I can not spend every minute trying to apply enough traction. Feel free to email me- I think I had already given you my email, or PM me for it- and maybe explaining the pain you have been having, I may be able to see if it is similar to the pain I have gone through, to see if it sounds like a healing type pain vs there is a new problem type pain. Hope maybe having a good cry and then focus on your goal of continuing to do all you can. Taking a nap may help too. When you wake up you may have a new understanding of what was said. If the pain is limiting what you can do, then maybe we can help you work out ways to do the things you are wanting to do. HUGE Cyber ((((Hugs)))) Please know that we CAN make it through this! We have to fight to do even the simplest of things we use to do so easily. Situations like what we have gone through sure puts things into perspective, like the posts from people who missed out on a $1.97 design and acting as if the Earth is being thrown off it's axis- You are doing so well and do so much, which is also an inspiration to others, who can not comprehend how tough everything is, that you go through. If tears are getting too much and sleep is not an option, try to do something that will lift your spirit or something like some of the brain computer games that would use enough brain that you can not think too much of other things besides the game.More(((Hugs))) and feel free to PM me. Pam

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graceandham by graceandham 03 Feb 2016

pacmp has offered you so much wisdom and hope above and I'm so glad she's here and you're here together. Will continue praying for your health.

pldc by pldc 03 Feb 2016

Pam you said it perfectly! I just had a nap & I can look @ this with a different perspective. LOL I have already chosen fabrics & a die cutter to finish a quilt top that I was working on some time ago. I have a renewed desire to put this behind me & move forward. I will choose to look @ this my way & not the Dr.'s far away plan. Cuties are the best thanks for your support Pam & I pray that we both continue to improve even if it is just a little each day. When the pain sets up back a day or two I will remember that I am not alone in this recovery. Thank you for you thoughts & prayers it mean more then you can know. ~hugs & Prayers for you too ~

pacmp by pacmp 03 Feb 2016

I am so glad you were able to take a nap, once I am as upset as you were, it seems nothing fully improves until I can have a nap or a good nights sleep. We are fighters and we will always try to find ways to see the glass half full, not half empty. You are through WAY more than 1/3 of your journey and I would liken it to walking out of a long tunnel. You can start to see the light a long ways prior to finally getting out of a tunnel. You went into the tunnel the day of your injury. There was the time prior to dx, then time leading up to surgery and at that point you were then at the half way point and every day and step has brought you closer to the end of that tunnel. We are both seeing the light, the sunlight is growing brighter with every step we make. While you may not be out of the tunnel, the light is never dimming only growing brighter. Even on our roughest days we are not going backwards in the tunnel, we are just stopping and taking a nap prior to moving forward again. Keep creating and when you have pain, know that God is still working to correct things and helping your body to heal. I Know with every fiber of my being that if the Lord needed my body fixed, or yours, this very instant, then it would be so. As that has not happened, then what I & you are going through, is for our own growth, and likely also for those around us. Sometimes for our families, sometimes friends and sometimes even for our doctors, who all continue to learn and grow in their understanding of our conditions. Thank you for your hugs too. It truly does help to know that we are not alone in our struggles and it is a comfort to know that there are others who really do "get it" when we explain what we are going through. Looking forward to seeing the quilt top that wont be in your unfinished project pile for much longer! ((Hugs)) Pam

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by bevintex 03 Feb 2016

Try and take it just one day at a time instead of thinking long term. You have come too far to let his words get you down, it will get better.

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pldc by pldc 03 Feb 2016

Thanks Bev your right one day @ a time............

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by rescuer Moderator 03 Feb 2016

You are doing GREAT! Don't be discouraged. Life always has bumps, bruises and twisting turns...a least you know what some of your bumps will be. Sending hugs

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pldc by pldc edited 03 Feb 2016

sigh............sometimes there are too many & I get sad just thinking I have another 10 years of expected outbursts of pain

rescuer by rescuer 03 Feb 2016

Doctors said I should expect one of my sons to stay in NICU for a minimum of 3 months when he was born pre-mature and unable to breathe unassisted. He was tiny -- but a fighter! He was released in 10 days and without feeding tube or oxygen. NEVER give up or give in to the "dark side"
There is always hope!

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